Saturday, March 28, 2009

MR Fanfic (MPOV) Chapter one

Okay, I've decided to write a Maximum Ride fanfiction, because I'm in the Max Ride mood. :P So, it'll just be titled "MR" with either "MPOV" (Max's point of view) or "TPPOV" (Third-person point of view) written next to MR. So there ya go. (And, you know, chapter break ups and stuff...) So here it is, CHAPTER ONE!!!

We were in a mall. Yes, a mall. What can I say? They had a food court and books and clothes, and we actually had some cash to spend. (Stolen cash, but cash no less.) We had already eaten, and were now wandering around, looking at stuff, and all the people looking at us. We were a group of grungy looking kids, sucking down slurpies and soda, and walking a teeny black dog who was trying very hard not to start shouting at all the people staring at us. We were a sight to behold. Suddenly, Nudge stopped dead in her tracks and gasped. "What?" I asked, going full alert.

"Look. At. The. SHOES!" Nudge cried, starting to hyperventilate. I rolled my eyes and sighed as Nudge dashed forward to look at the boots she had spied.

"Can we go look too, Max?" Angel asked, referring to herself and Total. I shrugged and nodded, and they both ran after Nudge. I glanced over at Gazzy and saw him whispering to Iggy.

"Max, can we please, please, please, pleeeeaaase go over to the toy store!" Gazzy begged.

"Nuh-uh! I wanna go to the thech store!" Iggy said.

"Toys first, tech later." I said, and the two ran off.

"You really think that's a good idea?" Fang asked quietly. I smiled.

"We're in a mall, Fang. What can go wrong in a mall?" I asked sarcastically, smiling at him. I turned and began walking towards the bookstore. I wanted to see how many of our books they had in stock, see if they needed more. Nothing boosts your spirits more than seeing all of your books sold out. I had just started to look at how many "Final Warning"'s they had when this lady walked up to me and smiled. She had a stroller.

"You ready to go, honey?" She asked innocently.

"Huh?" I asked, totally taken off guard by her. She wasn't my mother, or anyone I recognized, but she was calling me "honey" ...should I be suspicious?

"Are you ready to keep walking? Remember, we need to get you some new jeans and a skirt for Easter." She continued, like I was her daughter.

"Listen, uh, I don't think that I'm who you think I am..." I said slowly, not sure how to break this to her. I mean, what if she was some crazy lady who just randomly claimed grungy looking kids as her own? Her brow creased for a moment, then cleared and she smiled.

"Come on, I know you wanna stay with the books, but we have to go." She said, more serious now.

"But I'm not who you think I am." I said, backing away. She stared at me and opened her mouth to say something when suddenly, I heard an explosion. "Oh no" does not even start to describe what I thought.

I dashed out of the bookstore and looked first towards the toy store and tech store, hoping that the explosion was only Gazzy and Iggy being stupid. I didn't see either of them. The clothes store, bookstore, tech and toy stores were all in the same general area, but I didn't see any or my Flock. I was starting to panic. The lady was standing next to me and she grabbed my sleeve.

"Come on, we're leaving." She said firmly, looking a little freaked out.

"I have to go find my Flock." I said, pulling my arm away from her. I dashed off down the hall towards the entrance we had entered through, and I heard the lady running behind me. I didn't know what to think of her. I mean, she thought I was her kid! That made me wonder where her real daughter was. But before I was able to process that thought, a whole new flood of thoughts over took it as I skidded to a halt in front of a destroyed army of MGeeks.

Okay, "Army" was a stretch, but it was a lot of scattered robot pieces. The lady grabbed my arm then turned me around to face her. "Look," I began, "go back to the bookstore and look for your daughter, 'cause I ain't her." I said.

"I walked all around the bookstore before I came and found you! So therefore, I know that you are here!" She exclaimed, seeming to get angry at me. I sighed as I realized I was going to have to take drastic action to make this woman believe me. So, I whipped out my wings, right there in the mall in front of all those people. I heard gasps, and the lady standing in front of me went pale.

"You're..." She said quietly.

"Maximum Ride." I supplied quickly. "Now, if you'll excuse me-" I turned to start walking away.

"Wait, if you're not my daughter, where is she?" The woman asked, her voice breaking near the end of her sentence. I looked back at her, being only a arm length away.

"Would she run away?" I asked, wanting to get this over with quickly. The woman shook her head "no" I sighed. "Then either my Flock mistook her for me, or the bad guys did." Her face was drained of all color after I said that. "I have to go." I said, I went to pull my arm away from her when she tightened her grip.

"Max-" Her voice broke and she swallowed hard. I looked into her eyes and saw tears forming. "Please, bring my daughter back safely." It sounded like she was going to cry, and I saw real worry in her eyes. It made me think of my mom, and how worried she was about me all the time.

"I will. I promise." I said, my own voice weak. I hate mushy emotions more than any other emotions, but before I knew it, I was giving this stranger a hug, whispering a promise in her ear. "I promise I'll bring her back in one piece." I felt the woman's tears on my shoulder, her body shaking. I pulled away from her then dashed down the hall, hoping my Flock hadn't gotten too far without me.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I like it. Kinda confusing but a good plot I guess. I've seen worse. I'm ZeldaFan by the way

Mii Maker said...

Thanks, Zelda. I'm glad I'm not the worst writter you've ever seen. :P
;) The Mii Maker ;)